is someone getting the best the best the best the best of you?

I was reading this Sylvia Browne book yesterday on the train and bus and I was laughing embarrassingly loudly to myself. I had to call A to make it look like someone on the phone was making me laugh because it was ridiculous. If anyone wants to borrow it, just let me know because it is incredibly amusing.

I am changing my profile picture on this blog because I know that it probably is really difficult for A to come on here and look at it. I mean, I can't believe I was being so disregardful (I don't care if that's not a word) all along. I guess it's because I felt that if I took away that kissy faced picture, I would be giving away that time period when things were simple. Things were easy and I was going to school knowing (thinking) that I would want to work at my current job after graduation making a living wage (I use that term loosely). I thought everything was going to stay the same - that I'd be spending my free time drinking $2 draft beers, talking about the world's problems and philosophy and walking my dog through the park to play in the tennis courts with other dogs. I thought I'd be able to smoke cigarettes forever without dying. I thought that I'd be standing up to my best friend's wedding. I thought that was real. It wasn’t. I thought I'd continue to get parking tickets once a week and wait by my e-mail for an update on what was in store for the future. I thought that I could continue on ordering pizzas from the Giordano's in Logan Square and pay for them with my debit card when they were delivered. I thought I would carry around my cigarette butts until the next garbage can for fear that I would get yelled at. I thought that there would be many more empty Christmases - and there were - but they weren't that bad. I thought that there'd be more meetings and margaritas. There were. And they tasted better. For real.